Waving just makes me smile...

I love waving.  It's part of me - whether it is a big, dopey, "hale fellow well met" kind of wave; or the more subtle thumbs up I give my son, or even just the subtle nod of the head I give to a stranger at the four-way stop sign by my home, I am a waving/gesturing kind of guy.

When I think of waving, I always think of my good friend, Amy. Years ago I bumped into her walking down the street in a busy metropolitan area.  Really I should say she saw me and then I heard her before I saw her.

"Dennis!  DENNIS!" she yelled and, hearing my name called with such urgency, I turned and saw this buddy of mine walking fast, both hands over her head, seemingly waving with her entire body as she walked quickly over to say "hi."  It was such a great moment then and is still today a warm and happy memory - I think of it often when I am waving "hi" or "bye" to someone.

My mom is one of the best wavers I have ever met.  She waves as if there is nothing more important at that particular moment than you realizing that she sees you being wonderful, and she wants you to see that she sees you.  She waves and calls out "Hello you!  Do you see me seeing you!"  I see her do it with the kids and I can tell it makes a difference with them as well.  Even as a grown man it makes me feel like I am about 10 feet taller than I actually am.

And both of my kids are ardent wavers.  Kristin, the four year old, stands in the window every time I leave the house and waves furiously until I am out of sight.  In return, I wave as if I am trying to swim through the air to get back to her - alternating between waving like a lunatic and blowing a million tiny kisses in her direction. And Michael - the cool 10 year old - well secretly he is a crazy waver too.  He and Kristin fit right in - never, ever do they forget to kiss good night, or hello, or to wave to loved ones arriving or departing.  I love the idea of one of the grandmas or grandpa leaving for the long drive back to the city, and the last thing they see at my home is their grandkids waving from the porch like they just saw their granny or grandpa score a touchdown and spike the ball.

For many years I worked at a University here in Michigan.  I can honestly say that my favorite days were either the days the moms and dads dropped their kids off for the first time; or graduation days.  On the drop off days when I was working in the dorms, I got to see the kid side of the equation - kids and parents hanging on, standing in the lobby, giving hugs and kisses, then watching the moms fuss and worry.  Before long the parents would walk reluctantly to their car and slowly drive off, honking horns, flashing brights, waving out the windows as if to say "make sure you see me, please don't forget all we taught you, be good, wave, remember I see you and please see me seeing you!'  Such a gift to be a regular eyewitness to that wonderful view of humanity. 

The kids, for their part, would generally return the wave in earnest until the parents were gone and then immediately have some plan; food, girls, athletics - rarely, if ever - did the kid get dropped off for the first time and then retire quietly to the comfort of his room and study his Latin.  That part was fun to watch too,

But for me, graduation days were the absolute best.  The kids walking in with all the pomp and circumstance, energy pouring out of every person in the room.  And here and there parents standing up, on tip toe, craning their necks urgently to see their kid, the kid they taught to ride a bike, tie a shoe, use a spoon - that kid - walking through the door in cap and gown.  Invariably there was crazy waving - "...do you see me seeing you be wonderful? I love for you to see me seeing you!"  And the kids would wave back, happy, excited, perhaps a bit embarrassed "yes, I see you mom, but DO YOU SEE ME?!  Check me out!  Look here, I see you but are you seeing me? Can you believe this?!"

That gesture of waving, under the happiest of circumstances, is so golden, so precious.  It is perhaps unchanged in all of humanity.  A precious gift, to wave and see someone waving back as if it really mattered. I think it does really matter 

Today, don't squander those opportunities to wave like you mean it, wave like a dirty little kid for whom the mere sight of his parents is the vision of home, and happiness, and security.  Wave like a proud parent searching the crowd for that beloved familiar face, so you can say "I see you!  Do you see me seeing you?!"

See the one you love and run like a wild person, arms over your head, and tell them how happy you are to see them; and let them know how happy it will be for you to see that they see you being happy to see them.  It's not hard - little kids do it all the time.  If it was that hard how could they do it? It just might make you feel happy, beloved, charmed.  You'll never know until you try it.

Thanks for stopping by my blog today and for sharing the blog and passing along all the wonderful comments and emails.  Each one of them is as welcome to me as is the wave from a dear friend on a busy street.  I am so glad to have the chance to visit with you (and yes, I do see you being awesome, and I am sure that you see me seeing you be awesome, too).

Dennis
smalltowndad@hotmail.com